Finding the right balance..

Over the past few weeks I have started noticing some changes with Lily.. One of them being good and the other bad! Lets start with the bad.. Just because I like happy endings and I would like this post to end happy

When becoming a parent I never thought I would face these problems.. I knew it wouldn’t be easy but no one, I mean no one prepared me for this! My four year old daughter has turned into a teenager! Her attitude stinks! All of mine and Bradley’s rules have grew wings and took a journey far, far away. During half term I had the most embarrassing outing experience, I am still cringing thinking about it now. Me and Bradley decided to go out with the kids just to have a look around town and grab a few things. Well while we was out Lily deicide she did not want to hold my hand, we was getting close to a crossing so I kept telling her that she needs to other wise she will have to give me her teddy.. Well her being the stubborn “teenager” she is, she decided to test what I said so I took her teddy and grabbed her hand, then all of a sudden I heard her scream “YOUR EVIL!” then cry out loud so everyone turned around and looked at us while she was screaming and crying as loud as she could. I have never felt so embarrassed to be honest.

Sadly this isn’t the only incident we have had but lucky enough these moments weren’t outside, that’s a plus right? Me and Bradley feel as if we have lost control. Our little girl has gone from a polite princess into a rude madam, for example Lily wanted a drink so she asked Bradley if she could have one. Bradley asked if she could ask again and say please this time in which she replied “No daddy you cannot tell me, only mummy can tell me!” I couldn’t believe my ears! Complete and utter shock took over both of us, but not as shocking as the next one. This one really got to me, Lily and Laila was watching cartoons and on normal days Lily would let Laila lay her head on her leg but this time Lily got really angry, shouted “Get off of me” and kicked Laila off of the sofa with both feet so she landed on her back, hit her head and cried of course but thankfully she wasn’t seriously hurt, one thing I would say Lily knew she did wrong as she got up and attempted run away because she knew she was going straight on the naughty step.

But hey, enough with the negatives as I could go on for a while. But the good side is she is actually eating more!! I haven’t weighed her as of yet but she is eating breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks! This is a huge relief off of mine and Bradley’s shoulders and hopefully we will start seeing her gain some weight, I don’t know if its in my head but when I pick her up she feels heavier but we will soon see, She still likes eating the same things all the time like pancakes for breakfast, scrambled egg for lunch.. Dinner time she don’t get to choose but she is eating them and telling me she really likes them and for snacks she has been having fruit, yoghurt and the odd sweets here and there, but I am truly happy with her eating but trying to find the right balance with her attitude as I am finding it hard to reward her eating but not her attitude.


Don’t worry she didn’t manage to eat all that chocolate, she still has a lot left as she only ate his ear off .. She can be such a wonderful little girl but these hurdles do make parenting that little more stressful.

Samantha x


Things have been a little stressful..

Sorry for the absence this week.. Things have been a bit hectic.

We have had such a nightmare, we had Lily’s dietician appointment which was useless! I travelled 20 miles by train and bus to wait 2 hours to be seen by the dietician to just feel like I was being judged, she looked at me like I didn’t know anything and She told me all the things I already know and I couldn’t get a word in! GRR! I am worried about Lily and people make it seem like I shouldn’t be. Even though she hasn’t lost weight, she is remaining the same weight at 12.7kg. Which to me is very worrying, but don’t get me wrong I am happy that she isn’t dropping any weight but at the moment I would love to see progress because this is something which effects our house hold daily.

Secondly Laila got the most horrid stomach bug! It lasted for 3 days and she still isn’t 100 percent recovered. We took a trip to the GP as I’ve personally never known a stomach bug to last longer than 24 hours, we have sent off a stool sample to rule out what bug she has so hopefully we shall get the results soon.

What has confused me lately as well is that I have been waking up with really bad headaches this past week, I really hope these don’t stick around much longer as I do not fancy another doctors visit at the moment, I really cannot put my finger on what is the matter with me, normally I can cope with this sort of load but I feel so tired… It’s only these past few days I have dragged myself up and thought you know what I need to get this house work done and stop letting this tiredness get the better of me. I really wish I could of made this half term fun for the kids but unfortunately I’ll have to wait for the next holidays now as Lily returns to nursery tomorrow..

I never want to become one of those mums…

This is a subject that I am very scared to write about, I keep telling myself not to write about it, should I listen to myself? Honestly I am not sure.. I really need to get this off my chest but I don’t know where I should start..

I never want to become one of those mums who don’t listen to their children’s concerns and problems, shouldn’t a mother give guidance and wisdom to their child, make them feel safe and secure?

Not the mother I know.. My mother isn’t even the slightest concerned about my problems nor her grandchildren well not mine anyway..

How can a mother randomly ring her daughter up and make her feel as if she is worthless? This is why I have deicide to never answer those random phone calls again, you might be thinking you never want to talk to your mum? Well would you if she only rings you once every 6 months? Not even in the morning only late at night, she never rings in the morning. When I had I.C.P with Laila in fact the whole pregnancy she didn’t even ring me once after I had my c-section she never even called to say congratulations, she came to see her and Lily once for 5 minutes. Lily keeps asking me why she hasn’t got a Nan it is very hard to explain this to her. The last ever conversation I had with my mum ended in tears and I never want to feel like that again. She thinks Laila’s name is Lila for some strange reason, She even called me disgusting for breastfeeding, She never rings on Lily’s or Laila’s birthdays nor mine which doesn’t bother me, I just don’t know how I’m going to explain to the girls.

There is so many memories I can type about this subject but honestly I think this post would never end, I just wanted to get this rant off of my chest and I feel so much better for it! I am debating if I should post this or not. It is going to be very hard to press publish but I think sharing this will help take some of the weight off.

Yaki Soba Recipe


Preparation time: 15 mins
Cooking time: 20 mins

I thought I would share this recipe with use because its very easy and tastes amazing!


  • 1 green pepper
  • 1 carrot thinly sliced
  • 1/4 sliced white cabbage
  • 1 onion sliced
  • 1 tbsp of sesame oil
  • Packet of fresh egg noodles
  • 330g of pork loin steaks sliced
  • Eggs (optional)

For the sauce

  • 1 tbsp of Mirin
  • 2 tbsp of Soy
  • 3 tbsp Worcestershire sauce

Firstly mix all the sauce ingredients in a bowl or jug and set aside then begin to prep the veg and meat.


Heat some oil in a wok until it is fairly hot then add the meat and stir fry until the meat is just about cooked then you remove it from the wok and put to the side. Then turn the heat down to a medium heat and add the onions, carrots, green pepper and cabbage then stir fry for about 10 minutes or until your preferred texture. If you want boiled eggs with your dish then this is the time to start boiling them.


Once your vegetables are to your preferred texture return the meat along with the egg noodles and sauce, toss everything together and cook for about 3-5 minutes. Then serve and enjoy!